Enmeshed Mhuri May Stunt Dzimwe Relations
Miitiro yemamwe mhuri inogona kufadza, asi kazhinji kutaura, chero chinoshanda kumhuri chaiyo yakanaka. Hazvina mhosva kuti nyika yose inofungei. Dzimwe nguva, zvechokwadi, tsika dzemhuri dzinotungamirira kusina basa. Kushamwaridzana kwemhuri kunosuruvarisa chaizvo. Asi mhuri dzakagadziriswa kune rumwe rutivi rwomugumisiro unoratidza kuti mhuri zvechokwadi inogona kuva pedyo zvikuru.
Zvakanakira Kuva Pedyo
Ongororo dzakawanda dzakaratidza kuti kubatana kwemhuri kunoderedza kushushikana kubva kune dzimwe nzvimbo. Yakatove yakaratidzwa nekukurumidza kuporesa kubva pakugadzikana kwepanyama. Mhuri dzePaspeji, somuenzaniso, dzinowanzoswedera pedyo, uye ukama hwepedyo hunogona kuita kuti upenyu hurefu huripo hwevaIndia vokuAmerica.
Asi vazhinji vedu tine kusiyana kukuru mukati memhuri dzedu, uye zvinetso zvinogona kuitika apo mhuri dzisingabvumi nhengo idzodzo dzinoda kubviswa zvishoma kubva mumhuri. Izvo-nhengo dzemhuri dzinoshamwaridzana dzinomiririra pakukurukurirana nguva dzose, kuvhara kana vasingatori foni vachizviisa muzviitiko pasina kushevedza-zvose kuvhiringidzwa kwevamwe-vemhuri dzemhuri.
Kune mhuri dzakawanda, chinangwa ndechekuva nekutaura pasina kuve kuda kana kuti kuisa mukana. Kukurukurirana kwekombiyuta kwakaita kuti chinangwa ichi chive nyore zvikuru kusvika. Vanasekuru navanasekuru vanogona kutumira mwana kutumira mameseji, tora muzukuru mu Facebook post kana tweet, kana kuziva kana muzukuru akaisa chero chinhu mu Instagram, zvose pasina kudai kuti atarisire.
Zvechokwadi, magetsi ekukurukurirana haabatsiri kutarisana chiso nechiso nenguva uye foni nguva. Kune dzimwe nguva apo iwe unongoda kunzwa inzwi romumwe wemhuri uye iwe unofanirwa kungotora foni. Kana Skype kana FaceTime uye iwe unogona kuona zviso zvevadiwa, zvakare.
Mhuri Dzakashata Dzakashata
Kana pane chinhu chakadai sekuve pedyo zvikuru, zvinotora nzvimbo mune dzimwe nyanzvi dzepfungwa dzinodana "enmeshed" mhuri.
Mhuri dzakadai, hukama hwemhuri huchaenda kune dzimwe hukama hukama. Vaya vari mumhuri dzakagadzirirwa vanotarisirwa kutarisa mukati memhuri kuti vagutsikane uye vatsigire pane kutendeukira kunyika huru. Iyi tsika inogona kukanganisa kukura kwavo semunhu mumwe nomumwe.
Mune mhuri yakagadziriswa, somuenzaniso, chisarudzo chemunhu wemhuri kutora basa kune guta riri kure rinogona kukonzera kushungurudzika kukuru. Manzwiro ndeokuti mhuri iri kutengeswa uye yakasiyiwa. Mhuri ine utano, sarudzo iyi inogona kukonzera marwadzo, asi haisi kuonekwa sekutengesa kwemhuri.
Mhuri yakagadziriswa, nhengo dzinoitwa kuti dzizvinzwe dziine mhosva kana dzisingashanyi zvakakwana, kana kudana zvakakwana, kana kana dzisina mhemberero dzemhuri. Mhuri ine utano, nhengo dzakadaro dzinogona kunge dziri vagamuchiri zvimwe zvikwangwani kana kuti vamwe vachiseka, asi havaiti kuti vanzwe vane mhosva.
Wati wambonzwa mumwe munhu achinyunyuta nezve "drama" mumhuri yake here? Mikana ndeyokuti mhuri inoenderana nehuwandu hwemhuri yakagadziriswa, iyo iyo nhengo yemhuri imwe neimwe inonzwa ichifanira kuita chero chii chiri kuitika muupenyu hwevamwe nhengo dzemhuri, kubudirira kuwedzera kupesana.
Imwe nzira yemaitiro asingabatsiri inowanikwa mumhuri dzakagadziriswa ndeyekuti kushamwaridzana mukati memhuri nguva dzose kuumbwa, kuputsika, nekugadzirwa zvakare, kunyanya nokuti nhengo dzemhuri dzinotarisirwa kusarudza mativi pamagazini ose.
Kuramba uine uyo ari kune rutivi rwavo anokonzera kushungurudzika mumhuri.
Vamwe Vanonyatsovhara Mhuri
Heano mamwe mimwe miitiro yehutano inowanikwa mumhuri dzakasungwa.
- Anne akafamba kumba achibva kuCaribbean hofisi kuti apinde pamariro ehanzvadzi. Mhuri yake yakakura, uye akanga asina kunyanya pedyo nehanzvadzi iyi, asi ingadai yakange iri kuputsa tsika dzemhuri kusavepo.
- George anosangana nemukadzi wechidiki wekutenda kwakasiyana uye anofunga kutendeuka. Vabereki vake vanovhundutswa nepfungwa yokuti achazosiya chitendero chemhuri yake.
- Apo vana vake vakuru vachabva vari mumugwagwa, Marie anoongorora migwagwa nemugwagwa mamiriro ezvinhu uye anovadana kuti avape mazano pamusoro pemigwagwa uye nekudzokorora kakawanda.
- John ari kutsvaga motokari yakanaka yakashandiswa. Anotarisirwa kuitenga kubva mumotokari yemukoma wababa vake, kunyange zvazvo asingavimbi ruzivo rwemotokari yemukoma wake.
- Melissa ane mwana mutsva. Amai vake vanomira zuva rega rega, vachifanirwa kubhadhara ruoko, asi anowanzopedza maawa mashomanana achitaura uye achitamba nemwana.
- Joan ari paimba yamai vake. Anocherechedza kuti amai vake vane zvimwe zvekudya muhomwe yake, saka anozvibatsira.
- Ralph ane mukana wekufambira mberi kwebasa, asi zvinoreva kureka kufamba uye kusina mhuri kuungana. Anotya kusungira nyaya yacho nevabereki vake nokuti anoziva kuti vachamutadzisa kunzwa aine mhosva.
Iyi mamiriro ezvinhu haasi kure zvakanyanya kure nemafambiro evanhu. Chinoita kuti zvive zvisina kukodzera isimba rekutsamwa kana tarisiro yemhuri isinganzwisisiki uye tsika dzese dzisina hanya nemiganhu.
Izvi zvinorevei kuna vanasekuru navanambuya?
Vanasekuru navanasekuru vane chido chakakosha chokuchengeta mhuri dzepedyo nekuti vanoda kuona zvizukuru vavo. Uye apo vazukuru vanounza mufaro mukuru muupenyu hweguru nanasekuru, vanasekuru naambuya vanounza zvikomborero zvakananga kune vazukuru vavo zvakare. Iko kukunda-kukunda.
Mukuwedzera, vanasekuru navanasekuru vanowanzoisa mutauriri wehukama hwemhuri, uye kune zvakawanda zvavanogona kuita kuti vaswedere pedyo asi vachiri kudzivisa enmeshment. Vanogona kugadzirisa kuungana kwemhuri, kuva dhiririro yekukurukurirana kwemhuri uye kugadzira tsika dzemhuri. Mukuwedzera, vanofanira kuita izvo nhengo dzose dzemhuri dzinoita, dzinoti:
- Iva nehanya nemafungiro emhuri yako asi ramba uine huwandu hwekubatana navo.
- Iva nehanya nematambudziko mukati memhuri asi usanzwa uchisungirwa kuverenga mukati mavo vose.
- Tsigira vashandi uye zvimwe zvisarudzo zvevana venyu, kunyange kana zvichireva kuti iwe uchava baba vako vari kure kure.
Vanasekuru navanasekuru vane chinetso chiduku, zvisinei. Chido chavo chokuramba vari pedyo nevemumhuri dzimwe nguva chingatungamirira kumiganhu yavo yekudarika. Vanasekuru nababa ndivo vabereki, asi isu hatisi vabereki vevana vedu. Vamwe vedu vane dambudziko rokuita kusiyana.
Apo vana vako vari vabereki vatsva, somuenzaniso, usafungidzira kuti kune musuo wakazaruka wemasuwo. Zvechokwadi, vanasekuru navanasekuru vanofanirwa kudzivisa kushanya kusina kufanirwa kwezvikonzero zvakawanda.
Izvo zvinokonzera kukakavadzana hazviperi apo vakura vanokura. Kana zvasvika kune zvikoro uye zvimwe zvezviitiko, vanasekuru navanasekuru vane ruzivo rwakanaka kuti vafambe. Vanofanira kugamuchirwa pamitambo uye kubudirira kwevoruzhinji, asi havafanire kufunga kuti vakagamuchirwa pamitambo, kudzidzira, usiku hwevabereki, kana kuti misangano yevadzidzisi.
Vanasekuru naambuya vanofanira kunge vari kunyanya kuchenjerera kuti varege kutarisa matanho emagariro evanhu vakuru, vanoda nguva yakawanda, nguva yekupedza pamwe chete navo, uye nguva yekushamwaridzana nevezera ravo. Vanodawo mamwe mavhiki mashoma asina kuongororwa nokuda kwezviitiko zvisinganzwisisiki.
Pamusoro pezvose, gara kunze kwekukakavadzana kwemhuri uko vana vako vangangodaro. Usafambisa, uye kupa mazano chete kana ukabvunzwa. Dzorerai chete kana kuchengetedzwa kwomumhuri kuchikanganiswa.
The Bottom Line
Zvinowanzova pfungwa yakaipa kutonga mhuri yako nokuienzanisa kune dzimwe mhuri. Mhuri dzakawanda dzinoratidzika dzichifara uye dzakabatana asi dzine nyaya dzakavanzika. Tonga mhuri yako chete kuburikidza nekuti inoshanda sei kwauri uye kune dzimwe nhengo dzemhuri. Kana iwe kazhinji uchinzwa uchidiwa uye uchitsigirwa, rega kutsamwa kwakanyanya kuende. Rudo uye tsigire nhengo dzemhuri yako, asi edza kuti usapedza zvasarudzo.